Friday, February 6, 2015


today i am thirty.
there are so many mixed feelings.
not in any sense of feeling "old" or any of that... i feel very very young. 
there is really a mix of three major emotions... excitement, anticipation, and nostalgia.

the nostalgia is mostly the realization that our baby days are over. i was telling someone recently that i spent my twenties raising babies, and that is truly how it felt. i had my first at 19 and then every two or three years (or a year and a half as it was with eislee and ollie) had another one. then it really felt like i was raising a baby for a good three years and at four they suddenly started to feel like a kid. i feel a bit sad that i will never have another baby... oh what a special experience it always was. but at the same time i feel very ready to move on to the next phase in my life.
cue the excitement and anticipation...
i think that part of the reason that thirty feels so monumental to me is that my baby turned four a week ago, and as i mentioned above that means the end of "baby" for me. that feels huge. i have never had a child hit four without a new baby in my arms. until now that is. so... here and now... at thirty... i look ahead to my next ten years and feel that they will be very different from the last ten.i am turning a corner and walking ahead into mostly new territory and it feels strange and exciting. 
so as i said... many emotions... and lots of sentiment.
today is off to an amazing start.
i have been reprieved from all of my usual duties. i slept in and snuggled with my little ones. i got a massage that i swear melted away five years of tension, and soon i will be off for a lunch date with my love, and a wonderful dinner (that i don't have to cook) with my amazing family.

if this is thirty.... i'll gladly take it... and any more years that come my way.
i am so lucky.
what a beautiful life.

the giant metal desk above:
that was my christmas present and now has some birthday bliss to do with it as well.
 will share more soon.


Kim said...

Happiest of days to you Jenny. Wishing you a year ahead filled with many good things. xo

jenny said...

oh thank you kim! i will be a wonderful year indeed :)

Summer said...

Happy Birthday Jenny!! Hoping this year is filled with wonderful things!! (Did you get my card?)

jenny said...

thank you summer! and no!!! i haven't! but now i will be watching the mail like a hawk :)

Julia Linsteadt said...

Happy Birthday! I turned 30 last year, and oh boy did I feel the same way you do. I am wishing you a wonderful year!

amanda said...

happy belated birthday sweet Jenny!
xo from nc

jenny said...

thank you :)

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