Friday, February 6, 2015

thirty








today i am thirty.
there are so many mixed feelings.
not in any sense of feeling "old" or any of that... i feel very very young. 
there is really a mix of three major emotions... excitement, anticipation, and nostalgia.

the nostalgia is mostly the realization that our baby days are over. i was telling someone recently that i spent my twenties raising babies, and that is truly how it felt. i had my first at 19 and then every two or three years (or a year and a half as it was with eislee and ollie) had another one. then it really felt like i was raising a baby for a good three years and at four they suddenly started to feel like a kid. i feel a bit sad that i will never have another baby... oh what a special experience it always was. but at the same time i feel very ready to move on to the next phase in my life.
cue the excitement and anticipation...
i think that part of the reason that thirty feels so monumental to me is that my baby turned four a week ago, and as i mentioned above that means the end of "baby" for me. that feels huge. i have never had a child hit four without a new baby in my arms. until now that is. so... here and now... at thirty... i look ahead to my next ten years and feel that they will be very different from the last ten.i am turning a corner and walking ahead into mostly new territory and it feels strange and exciting. 
so as i said... many emotions... and lots of sentiment.
today is off to an amazing start.
i have been reprieved from all of my usual duties. i slept in and snuggled with my little ones. i got a massage that i swear melted away five years of tension, and soon i will be off for a lunch date with my love, and a wonderful dinner (that i don't have to cook) with my amazing family.
 perfect.

if this is thirty.... i'll gladly take it... and any more years that come my way.
i am so lucky.
what a beautiful life.



the giant metal desk above:
that was my christmas present and now has some birthday bliss to do with it as well.
 will share more soon.

7 comments:

Kim said...

Happiest of days to you Jenny. Wishing you a year ahead filled with many good things. xo

jenny said...

oh thank you kim! i will be a wonderful year indeed :)

Summer said...

Happy Birthday Jenny!! Hoping this year is filled with wonderful things!! (Did you get my card?)
Xoxo!!!

jenny said...

thank you summer! and no!!! i haven't! but now i will be watching the mail like a hawk :)

Julia Linsteadt said...

Happy Birthday! I turned 30 last year, and oh boy did I feel the same way you do. I am wishing you a wonderful year!

amanda said...

happy belated birthday sweet Jenny!
xo from nc

jenny said...

thank you :)

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